Searching for mind

Siddhananda: (Showing a small yellow translucent stone) Okay, i see that little stone, yellow right.

G: Yep.

Siddhananda: Yeah, yellow, little thing there. It's got a nice white circular aura around it.

G: Aha.

Siddhananda: And, (long pause) Okay, they're saying they misplaced their mind somewhere. They can't find their mind.

G: (laughing).

Siddhananda: (laughing) It's like you misplace your hat or something.

G: I just left it somewhere. I don't know where i left it.

Siddhananda: Looking for it again, this energy can't find his mind, his/her.

G: Well, that could be a good thing and not a good thing. It depends on which way it is. So, we'll find out a little bit more on this. (laughing)

Siddhananda: He's saying, i must have left it somewhere. (laughing) He can't remember.

G: Maybe like the guy who left his heart in San Francisco.

Siddhananda: Yeah.

G: I don't know (laughing)

Siddhananda: Let's see if it's a good thing.

G: Maybe he left his mind in Cucamonga or something.

Siddhananda: There you go!

G: I don't know.

Siddhananda: There you go. Who knows where.

G: (laughing)

Siddhananda: (pause) They're saying it is and isn't a good thing. They feel a little (moving body circles to indicate being disorientated). what's happening here!

G: A little.

Siddhananda: And, they are looking for that mind.

G: Why would you want the mind back?

Spirit: Because i know it. I know what it is.

G: Yeah, because you know it. Okay. Well, if you actually knew it, you know it's just full of illusion.

Siddhananda: Maybe they want something more familiar.

G: So Why would you want illusion back?

Spirit: It's just isn't it. i just felt like it was what i am.

G: Aha.

Spirit: [The mind] told me who i am and what was right and wrong and who i wasn't. I don't know myself without it.

G: Yeah. So, again, you can question, "what is this I?" (pause) Don't be so quick to take back mind. (pause) with attachment to form and of these other things that you have done and think that it's you. It's not you. So, you have a very good opportunity to now question what is this I?

Spirit: What is this I?

G: Aha. Find out what you are and more importantly what you're not.

Siddhananda: (pause) Okay. So, they're going to stay with that right now.

G: Yeah.

Siddhananda: Thank you (hand on heart center).

G: Namaste (gesturing namaste) So, you may come back if you wish. I'm not going to put him over here to process. He can be where ever he wishes and if you want to come back and give us a progress report, we would be happy to hear it.

Siddhananda: Sounds good.

G: Thank you.

Siddhananda: Spend time on that instead of looking for the mind.

G: I left my mind in Cucamonga. (laughing)

Siddhananda: I'm seeking, trying to find it everywhere. I'm looking under the bed, i'm looking. (laughing).

G: Leave that thing alone (referring to the mind).

Siddhananda: Really, really.

G: (laughing).

Siddhananda: Take it back, you got the whole business back. So, everything that comes with it.

G: I'm sure there's a lot of people on this path that wish that they could lose the thing.

Siddhananda: Really, really.

Path of Kundalini

Siddhananda: (Picking up a new stone) So, here’s the next one, it’s a linga. (pausing with closed eyes). Ok, I’m just hearing “Darkness to light.”

G: Mmm hmmm. And what about darkness to light?

Siddhananda: They’re saying that’s the path of kundalini, question mark.

G: It is. Well, i wouldn’t say darkness, i would say the illusion to light, to the truth... breaking through the illusions that one holds. One goes through all the layers of consciousness and challenges all the belief systems and breaks through to the truth. [kundalini] pulls one along into that absolute point of non-duality, and discovering the Parabrahman, or God, whichever you wish to call [it]... that energy that is the seed for all.

Siddhananda: Ok, so they’re just nice and quiet now.

G: Mmm hmm.

Siddhananda: Yeah, they’re just feeling nice and still now, so...

G: So, I think that that one might want to... do they want to stay for a while in the crystal cave and just sit with that for a while?

Siddhananda: They want to go on the second shelf.

G: On the second shelf? Yeah, they can go on the second shelf (G and Siddhananda laughing). They can sit for a while and just kind of ruminate on that.

Siddhananda: (Gets up and puts the rock on the shelf, sits back down). Awwww, that’s funny! They’re choosing their own rooms here, where they want to go.

G: Yeah, “I want the second shelf!” Ok, you can go on the second [shelf]. (Laughing)

Illusion of Power

Siddhananda: (Holding up a stone) Black one... dark one.

G: Mmm  Hmmm

Siddhananda: (pausing with closed eyes) Ok, I just see that stone in my mind with kind of a dark aura around it, not negative feeling, but, seeing [the darkness]

G: And what is that darkness about?

Siddhananda: Strength, they’re saying.

G: What, strength?

Siddhananda: They’re saying strength.

G: And why do they think that dark is strength.

Siddhananda: Power... (chuckles slightly) that’s what they’re saying, but let's see why.

G: Mmm… hmm

Siddhananda: They’re saying "because it's like the earth."

G: Oh, because it's like the earth? Ok.

Siddhananda: Ok. so, what questions do you have for us today?

G: So what is it we can help with?

Spirit: More strength and power.

G: Yeah, that’s ego based.

Siddhananda: Yeah, I would say.

G: (Clears throat) Yeah, this is one that wants to think they can control everything and they’re not in the best thing. Are they open to the light?

Siddhananda: No, They’re saying no, but lets’s... No, they’re not, they just want some more powers.

G: Yep, no. We’re not going to help with that, because what they’re doing is self-deceiving, they’re just deceiving themselves, to think they would get anything by powers. The more powers they think they have the more they are separating themselves from God and thinking they’re the one in control, and, that’s not real power. They have an illusion of power.

Siddhananda: Yeah, they’re trying to put out more of that darkness, and it's just... (shakes head).

G: Yeah, they have an illusion of power.

Siddhananda: They’re pushing with all of their might to bring out more of that, themselves as that power, and it’s just... (shakes head, slightly smiling).

G: Ok, hold them for a minute. I’m going to give him a little demonstration of how much power he thinks he has. Ok? Hold him for a second.

Siddhananda: (Laughing).

G: Ready? (holds head down to one side, eyes closed).

Siddhananda: (Holds rock in fist up to camera).

G: You can’t go! (after several moments) You don’t like that? No you don’t like that at all... Ok. Yeah, he wants to go. Now how much power do you have?

Siddhananda: (smiling).

G: Do you have any power? You don’t. You have no power. Now do you think the dark is more powerful than the light? No.

Siddhananda: Yeah, I was hearing no.

G: Yeah, No! So ok, you can go ahead and let him down for a minute. Go ahead and put him down for a minute.

Siddhananda: (smiling, puts rock down).

G: Now you can either choose to go and be on your way or you can be ready to bow and open to the light, the God-light.

Siddhananda: I see an image of someone bowing. It is still dark, but...

G: Yeah, but he’s open to the light now because his way is not the way. He needed a little quick demonstration that that is not the way.

Siddhananda: So he’s saying he’s open, so...

G: Yeah, so we ask that the Christ-light would come to him, and he can do the Om-That-I-Am, the I-Am-That_I-Am and find the still place of God within him and release the ego, release the ego-drama, so he can see the fallacy of it. I’m sure he will see that Christ has much more energy than he does, and Christ’s came from sacrifice and from laying that down. So, the true knowledge and power comes [that way] and it has nothing to do with Ego. Ego separates one from that and they have an illusion of power, for a time (laughing).

Siddhananda: (Smiling). Yeah, so I do see an image of someone on their knees, bowing low and then Christ is there. They are definitely bowing low. Almost, I guess, almost like shaking.

G: Yeah, of course, because that’s going to be terrifying to that dark. That light is terrifying to that dark.

Siddhananda: They’re scared.

G: But they have to see there’s nothing to fear, they’ve lived in fear and self-protection and thinking that they are the power for so long that to relinquish that can be terrifying, but there’s nothing to fear in that.

Siddhananda: Yeah they’re trembling, they’re having a hard time looking up at that Light [of] Christ.

G: Yeah, because that light is very hard to look at, that vibration is so different. It's very, very difficult to open to that.

Siddhananda: Right!

G: But they have to realize that they will be fine. Yes, it's scary to open to that, but they will see there is such joy in that when they open to that. So, don’t have any fear but open your eyes and look and allow that to come in and dispel the shadows, dispel the negativity, dispel the illusions, to come to the truth of what it is and what it’s not.

Siddhananda: Good, and I can see an image of him kind of turning, and then he’s kind of taken up. He was scared, he was trembling but he did turn and he’s kind of taken up into that light.

G: Right (nodding)

Siddhananda: I’m just seeing a lot more light.

G: Right, (gesturing as if dispelling something by pushing hand up and out several times while spreading fingers) whatever’s there, that... I hate to use that [word] demonic mind play, Christ has no problem with, sending it... It's gone. He has no problem with it. Instant excorcism (chuckling).

Siddhananda: Pretty much!

G: It's what it is. Because those mind spins, they grow almost a personality of their own, they take on a life of their own, and then instead of them thinking they’re controlling, they’re being controlled, by that illusion.

Siddhananda (Nodding) right.

G: So, they can come back to balance now.

Siddhananda: That’s much better. Yeah, they’re in good hands now, and so we’ll go ahead and put that over there, I think. Namaste! They’re not saying much right now.

G: (gesturing namaste). Welcome on your journey. (Both laughing).

True Fulfillment

Siddhananda:  Okay, we've got our little linga (showing an oblong, black stone). So, here's our next feeling, or our next energy (laughing).

G: Well, that's it ... the next energy.

Siddhananda: (pausing with eyes closed) Hmm ... taking a long time with this one. I'm hearing, "Brushing heaven ... strokes of heaven," like painting that, or something.

G: Okay, is there something that you came to ask, or something you came to say, as the case may be?

Siddhananda: (sitting with eyes closed) What I'm hearing, and I asked if this was correct, is "Heaven here on earth."

G: (nodding) It can be, yes. [There's] no separation.

Siddhananda: They are disembodied now. With the strokes, maybe they're saying you create your own...

G:  ... your own reality.

Siddhananda: [You create your own] land, or reality, and that's what the strokes are, like in a painting.

G: Right, you create your own story.

Siddhananda: He's painted things for his story, which is the realm he's in right now. This realm of sun, really pretty sunsets and sun rises, and the sky is always beautiful colors. [There are] really nice mountains with flowing waters. This beautiful place, he said that he's painted that, and he's there.

G: Right.

Siddhananda: Sometimes he changes it, and paints it a different way (chuckling lightly with a smile).

G: (laughing)

Siddhananda: A different color today (grinning)!

G: Just want a different color today (laughing).

Siddhananda: He saying, "You can do that."

G: Yes, you can.

Siddhananda: Let's see what he's wanting here, though (closing her eyes). I think he's ready to move on. At least, I'm hearing that. I don't know if it's immediately, but I think he's trying to look at things a little more. Like is this really satisfying? Is it fulfilling ... eternally? [It's] that kind of thing.

G: Right, right (nodding).

Siddhananda: And I don't think it is for him (nodding).

G: No, no. You can do all that, yeah. You can create and you can call into being all of these different things, and these experiences, etc., but until one knows what's at the heart of being, that IS, that God presence, then after awhile it becomes un-fulfilling.

Siddhananda: I'm sure (nodding). It's just like the lokas, or ...

G:  ... the lokas, right ... the heavenlies. Mm hmm, right. They're kind of like vacation spots, one can say (laughing).

Siddhananda: Mm hmm, exactly.

G: [They're] like vacation spots for a time, but eventually one has to want to know what is truly at the heart of being. So, when you get ready to truly know what's at the heart of being, that's when you have to submerge into the heart.

Siddhananda:  He's really hearing you. I think he's been at this awhile (chuckling). He's painted his beautiful life, and he wants to say, that it's not all that it's cracked up to be in some ways. He's saying, "That's what ego would like, [what it's] always hankering after, and thinks that's it."

G: Ego thinks it wants it, but eventually finds out that that's not fulfilling.

Siddhananda: Right, and I think what he's saying is [that] it's still of ego.

G: It is still of ego (nodding).

Siddhananda: It's of a persona ...

G:  ... in control.

Siddhananda:  Yeah!

G:  It's still from control. I (ego) want to control my universe.

Siddhananda:  Of course, it does.

G:  It doesn't matter if you have control of the universe, and you make it as beautiful as you can, it's still empty of something.

Siddhananda: Right. For sure. For sure, and that's what he's feeling is there, that [emptiness]. There's still that ache there. There's that separation there.

G: Yeah. That's what he needs to find out. The separation is that he's attempting to control.

Siddhananda:  Mmm ... (closing her eyes).

G: You have to let go of all that control.

Siddhananda:  He's trying to be the manipulator of his reality.

G: Right, right, right. You have to let go. Like they say, let go and let God. Then, you'll find out there's nothing to control.

Siddhananda:  (pausing with closed eyes) This is hard for him to hear. It's a hard lesson.

G: It's a hard lesson (nodding yes).

Siddhananda:  Wooh ... it's a hard lesson for him! I mean, he's been at this for a long time.

G:  Yeah, exactly.

Siddhananda:  Even maybe while he was in body, he's been at this kind of thing, creating his own rightness for himself.

G:  Exactly!

Siddhananda:  This is a hard lesson, but I am feeling that he's open to it, but GOSH it hurts him.

G: It's hard to let go of that control when you've wanted that control for so long a time, and you've had that type of control to manipulate this and manipulate that. Having to let go and let God can be a difficult thing. Yeah, but you have to let go. Let go, and you will find out there was nothing to control (smiling).

Siddhananda: Oh, that's hard for him (shaking her head).

G: Yeah, it's tough (nodding with a smile).

Siddhananda:  I'm seeing a lightning bolt, though. I am seeing how that's ripping on him in a way that he doesn't even know, really, what he's asking for. But, that was at his heart ... that this has gone on too long ... that it's not true fulfillment.

G: No, it's not true fulfillment. The only true fulfillment is knowing that IS, that ever present IS that gives life, that is Life.

Siddhananda:  Absolutely! What you're saying is piercing him. What I saw is an image of this beautiful sunset with the mountains. I saw a ripping of that, but there was some light, like Christ, or energy, coming through that. It was like a torn canvas (gesturing as if slicing through a canvas with a knife).

G:  (nodding) It's the illusion. The illusion has to be torn, and one has to step into reality, because he's in a dream state of his own making.

Siddhananda:  Yes, that's it exactly!

G:  You have to wake up. Wake up! (laughing)

Siddhananda:  Yeah, this is hitting him. This is hitting him (nodding gravely).

G:  Absolutely, it's going to hit.

Siddhananda:  It's like those [Zen masters] ...  like you say, wake up! ... they hit you over the head, because you are just ... ehhhh (gesturing as if floundering in a kind of sleep) ... in your own ...

G:  ... in your own dream state ... in your own delusion.

Siddhananda:  Yeah, delusion ... fantasy world.

G:  Delusion and fantasy, yeah.

Siddhananda:  Which you may think is pleasant, but it's like that one guy that came in that ate all the sweets with the cavities. It does create [dis-ease]. It's not a healthy thing.

G: No, in the end, it's not, but it takes a long time to come out of that, and to see that that is not [beneficial]. You can tell people this for a long time, but they're not going to believe you. It takes a very long time, as is evidenced by this [soul's situation], to get that, and to find out that it is the truth, and that it is not fulfilling in the end. It's not.

Siddhananda: For sure. No, and you can really get [trapped] in your own world with that.

G:  Yeah, you can get lost in that for a lot of eons.

Siddhananda:  Wooh! ... and this one did.

G: It's a lot of eons, a lot of eons, and lifetimes, and ... yeah, yeah (nodding).

Siddhananda: Again, I think it's what people think they want sometimes, but ... boy! (shaking her head).

G:  Exactly!

Siddhananda:  But, think again! That's all. Just take some time to consider that.

G:  Yeah, yeah (nodding in full agreement).

Siddhananda:  So, anyway, that image is there with that ripping apart [of the illusion], the light, and Christ there. It's strong! He's feeling that. That's what he's saying. He's really feeling that in his heart with that lightning bolt like a Vajra (opening her eyes wide).

G: Yep, like the Vajra (nodding gravely).

Siddhananda:  Like the Vajra!

G: Yeah, it's very, very strong. We'll let him go ahead to find out [what] Christ [is], and surrender into that, surrender into God. Have no fear in that, and find out what is at the center of being.

Siddhananda:  Christ is there, yeah (nodding).

G:  He's chased the illusion long enough.

Siddhananda: Oh, man (shaking her head).

G:  He knows what all the illusion is (laughing).

Siddhananda: Yeah (nodding and smiling). You know what you want, or maybe, it's what you don't want now, but still ...

G:  Exactly, ... but now find out the truth (laughing).

Siddhananda:  I am seeing some dripping colors (gesturing as if paint is melting down a canvas). They're starting to drip. It's his sorrow, but also it's ...

G:  Yeah, yeah ... he's starting to let that go of it (mimicking Siddhananda's gesture of paint dripping).

Siddhananda:  ... letting go, yes.

G:  Yeah, it's starting to melt (nodding with approval).

Siddhananda:  It's releasing all of the emotions attached. That's melting. I can see it's like melting colors in the rain just dripping down, and then there's Christ there.

G:  When he sees what the reality is, he'll see it's much more beautiful than anything he could ever create (smiling joyfully).

Siddhananda:  Mmmm ... he's drinking that in. He is. He is. It's going to be a little while maybe, but I don't know. No one can say with these things in time. Who am I to say, but it is beginning ... quite intensely, actually. So, that's a good thing.

G: (gesturing namaste) So, we will leave him with that.

Siddhananda: (gesturing namaste)

G: He's got enough to process for awhile (laughing).

Siddhananda:  I think so! (laughing as she places the stone aside)

G:  Thank you for coming.

Siddhananda: Thank you for melting! (laughing)

G:  (laughing) I'm melting!

Siddhananda:  I'm melting! No, but it's all good (smiling).

Phenomena Must Go

Siddhananda: I see this little rock in my mind again, which is what seems to be happening today, with some nice light. Instantly, there is a crackly fire, and the fire is turning into what looks like a rose. It’s got some energy coming off of it ... a lit up burning rose. It’s nice actually … wow, that’s very clear… Whew! I can feel the heat of it even. It’s a fire rose with energy or smoke coming off of it.

G: Wow!

Siddhananda: I am hearing the phenomena needs to go … the attachment to phenomena.

G: Right, that’s why I don’t have anybody doing third eye stuff, because that’s the way they develop a lot of extra phenomena that doesn’t need to be there. That’s why we don’t give that practice with the third eye (pointing to her third eye).

Siddhananda: Yeah, sure, boy, because that can go on forever.

G:  Exactly, because you can get attached to phenomena. It’s like that one … what’s the name of that one sadhu? He wrote the book where all he talks about is all his phenomena. People are so gravitating to that, but that’s not it. All of these realms and all these different things … you don’t need to go there. You don’t need to go to all these different realms. You can go straight into the heart of being and find that ultimate truth.

Siddhananda: Exactly! So what I’m seeing is that rose being burnt to ash as a way of saying … I mean it is beautiful indeed … but that phenomena needs to go. There is the sun … then, there is the light … there is the ground … the ground, that’s grounding. The other two are ungrounding, as you talked about, where people get so attached to the phenomena and realms. That can actually really make you so ungrounded, and get really out of it.

G: You can be wandering for lifetimes and lifetimes and lifetimes with endless stuff…  because the mind can create unending phenomena.

Siddhananda: That’s it! I do kind of see an image of a ghost. They are reflecting almost like that is just ghosty… like a phantom mist. That’s not what you want to be gravitating to.

G: Right, it’s an illusion. It’s not the reality, but you can create as much illusion as you want. It’s just another movie.

Siddhananda: Right, and the mind is very creative, so that’s the thing. I do see that, like I say, then the ground is reflected as that’s the non-dual … is what remains. That’s the strength … the core … and the balance … and all that comes, comes from that. So you want to go to the origin of the whole thing.

G: Right. Then, after that, if you want to enjoy the play, enjoy the play … whatever! Then, it becomes the liberated play, once the mask is off. Then, you see it for what it is.

Siddhananda: Right. So, then it’s a whole other thing entirely.

G: Exactly. Then it becomes play. It doesn’t become, again, another phenomena… whoo (laughing)!

Siddhananda: Exactly! It’s not like, look at me! Look at what I can see and do, and see how neat this is, because it’s not a game. You can play it if you want to, and play it how you want to play it, but it will bring you somewhere else. Somewhere away from Truth.

So we’ll say goodbye to that one!

Fire Rose

A nice light is seen and instantly a crackly fire turning into a rose appears, just a lit up burning rose, so crystal clear is seen. One can feel the heat of it. The heart of the fire rose with energy or smoke coming off of it can be felt.

This spirit says, the attachment to phenomena needs to go.

That is why third eye practices are not good. A lot of phenomena can be developed and one can get attached to it or lost in it. There is no need to go there.

One can go right into the heart of being and find that ultimate truth.

What is seen next is that rose burnt to ash, so beautiful, but needs to go. Then there is the sun or the ground (of being) that appears.

This attachment to phenomena and different realms, one can get lost in for lifetimes.

An image of a ghost is being reflected as if that is a phantom mist, an illusion, not the reality.

It is just another movie and the mind is very creative and can create endless realms..

Then the ground is reflected as being the non-dual is what remains, the strength, the core, the balance.

You want to go to the original, the origin of the whole thing. Then you can enjoy the play. Once the mask is off,  you can see it for what it is. Then it is play and not another tangent (phenomena) one can get lost in.

The spirit wants to convey, this attachment to phenomena will only bring you away from truth.